Thothmuffin
Don't get any crumbs on the scale of judgement.
Thursday, November 25, 2004
Validation
Yay, I just got my NaNovel validated! This process involves encrypting the MS and uploading it for an automatic count. I encrypted my document by replacing all the letters with S. Watching a month of work turn into a nonsensical but extremely sibilant pattern of shapes was both horrifying and oddly mesmerizing. I also used this opportunity to gather some statistics on the frequency of word usage in my novel, which I present to you in table form (these counts are out of 67,100 words):
lord 215
fuck 60
wing 95
Heaven 71
Hell 108
Also, on a non-Nano note for once, I would like to share with you a recent reader reaction to a Thothmuffin quiz, brought to you in part by davesque:
davesque: oh I was so angry
davesque: I took the most recent quiz featured on TM's site
davesque: only I got envy and I wanted to be sloth T_T
thothmuffin: hahahah omg that is full of irony
davesque: hahaha
davesque: didn't think of that ^_^;;
And Happy Thanksgiving. Larry's ravages have been soothed with sweet sweet turkey. <3
lord 215
fuck 60
wing 95
Heaven 71
Hell 108
Also, on a non-Nano note for once, I would like to share with you a recent reader reaction to a Thothmuffin quiz, brought to you in part by davesque:
davesque: oh I was so angry
davesque: I took the most recent quiz featured on TM's site
davesque: only I got envy and I wanted to be sloth T_T
thothmuffin: hahahah omg that is full of irony
davesque: hahaha
davesque: didn't think of that ^_^;;
And Happy Thanksgiving. Larry's ravages have been soothed with sweet sweet turkey. <3
Monday, November 22, 2004
Victory is Mine
22 days. 21 chapters. 130 pages. 65,442 words.
One happy muffin.
My book is done! Long live my revisions!
I will send Counterpoise out when I am finished with the first quick and dirty revisions to make it readable and comprehensible, which should still be Dec. 1. Hope springs eternal.
My brain has the pleasant texture of oatmeal, and my stomach the pleasant clime of the surface of the planet Venus during its daytime. People who say the creative process is beautiful and joyous and uplifting are full of shit, unless they have just gotten published and do not have to write again for six months, in which case I will allow them their happy delusions.
Part of me loved writing this book more than anything I've ever done.
I will acknowledge its presence on Dec. 1, or when Larry stops trying to chew a shortcut to my spleen.
One happy muffin.
My book is done! Long live my revisions!
I will send Counterpoise out when I am finished with the first quick and dirty revisions to make it readable and comprehensible, which should still be Dec. 1. Hope springs eternal.
My brain has the pleasant texture of oatmeal, and my stomach the pleasant clime of the surface of the planet Venus during its daytime. People who say the creative process is beautiful and joyous and uplifting are full of shit, unless they have just gotten published and do not have to write again for six months, in which case I will allow them their happy delusions.
Part of me loved writing this book more than anything I've ever done.
I will acknowledge its presence on Dec. 1, or when Larry stops trying to chew a shortcut to my spleen.
Sunday, November 21, 2004
The *finest* oil
60,000 words. It's starting to feel inappropriate to update my NaNometers. I don't even know if my blog one can handle it. We'll see. Still writing. Time for another theme-appropriate quiz.
Which deadly sin do you represent? (Angel Sanctuary Pics)
brought to you by Quizilla
Which deadly sin do you represent? (Angel Sanctuary Pics)
brought to you by Quizilla
Saturday, November 20, 2004
Crossing the Line
I just wrote 50,000 words in 20 days.
Wow.
That feels good.
But I'm not done yet! I estimate my plot is at about 85%. Only ten days to wrap, proofread, edit, and format. I think I can do it. I am so hoping to have something readable for you all on Dec 1.
You know where I'll be for the next ten days. *hugs Snake* Back to it!
Wow.
That feels good.
But I'm not done yet! I estimate my plot is at about 85%. Only ten days to wrap, proofread, edit, and format. I think I can do it. I am so hoping to have something readable for you all on Dec 1.
You know where I'll be for the next ten days. *hugs Snake* Back to it!
Wednesday, November 17, 2004
Lies, Damn Lies, and Internet Quizzes
Those of you watching my NaNometer know that I'm still alive, if not exactly diversifying my portfolio of activities to include blog posting of late. Updates on my life: Figured out how book will go. Memorized another 30 Lines of Paradise Lost (which I will spare you). Took internet quizzes (gacked from Chibimonnie).
My results from the What Religion (Read: Christian-paradigm spectrum position) Best Suits You? Quiz:
Take the quiz: "WHAT RELIGION BESTS SUITS YOU?"
Pagan/Occultist
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law. Spending your entire life searching various forms of philosophy and religion, you choose to observe everything and believe little. Your personality is one of truth seeking, nature respecting and god/goddess accepting. Lastly, you don't judge anyone, but if annoyed, you will exact some form of revenge. You don't believe in the Three-Fold Law. [Edited by TM for grammar.]
This is fairly apt, although the closest thing I have to a God is a convoluted metaphor involving children's non-toxic all-purpose glue. I have decided that I quite like the panache of the term occultist, however, and number among some of my dearest goals the hope that a fascination with symbology and demonology will someday turn into something lucrative. Probably fantasy novels, though I'm open to other opportunities.
Here is the breakdown of my answers by category. This will be important later:
* Fundamentalist Christian (You scored 0)
* Holy Roller (You scored 0)
* Average Christian (You scored 0)
* True Christian (You scored 0)
* Modern Satanist (You scored 2)
* Theistic/Traditional Satanist (You scored 0)
* Luciferian (You scored 0)
* Devil Worshipper (You scored 0)
* Atheist (You scored 2)
* Agnostic (You scored 0)
* New Aged/Wiccan (You scored 0)
* Pagan/Occultist (You scored 3)
* Discordian (You scored 0)
* Category Unknown (You scored 3)
I think my modern Satanist scores come from my willingness to examine Satan's role as an archetype. Also, possibly, the fact that I am writing a book about Satan and his sweet sweet love. With that in mind, I took the quiz for Beelzebub, just to see what happened. He came up as....
True Christian
You are humble, gracious, kind and extremely Christ-like. You believe in the bible as your law, but read it in its original language. Perhaps you're not a scholar, but you're not an amateur either. You normally don't feel church is acceptable for your form of worship, and if anyone believes different from you, you might try to learn something from them. [Edited once more for spelling by TM].
Now, I know Bill is very self-sacrificing, but this seems a bit improbable. Let us examine his breakdown of answers:
* Fundamentalist Christian (You scored 0)
* Holy Roller (You scored 0)
* Average Christian (You scored 0)
* True Christian (You scored 3)
* Modern Satanist (You scored 2)
* Theistic/Traditional Satanist (You scored 0)
* Luciferian (You scored 3)
* Devil Worshipper (You scored 1)
* Atheist (You scored 0)
* Agnostic (You scored 0)
* New Aged/Wiccan (You scored 0)
* Pagan/Occultist (You scored 0)
* Discordian (You scored 0)
* Category Unknown (You scored 1)
Now we see the faults inherent in the system! Bill loves the Prince of Darkness for his glory, his unswerving devotion to his principles, and his skill in the bedchamber, and is on a first-name basis with him. However, the Lord of Flies is also a little pissed that Luce got them all in this mess, and will be the first one to tell you that Satan is a force for evil and corruption, and as such, rather dangerous to be around.
Apparently unable to aggregate trends towards worship of the Arch-Enemy, the quiz has decided that Bill, due to his credulous and fairly canonical acceptance of the LORD and Jesus Christ as the Powers Most High, is a True Christian. Ah, if only faith were enough... unfortunately for Bill, believing that God will kick his ass if he sneezes wrong does not constitute being a devoted Christian.
This reminds me of an excerpt from my book, but I can't post it here because it's far too naughty. *tantalizes the audience*
My results from the What Religion (Read: Christian-paradigm spectrum position) Best Suits You? Quiz:
Take the quiz: "WHAT RELIGION BESTS SUITS YOU?"
Pagan/Occultist
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law. Spending your entire life searching various forms of philosophy and religion, you choose to observe everything and believe little. Your personality is one of truth seeking, nature respecting and god/goddess accepting. Lastly, you don't judge anyone, but if annoyed, you will exact some form of revenge. You don't believe in the Three-Fold Law. [Edited by TM for grammar.]
This is fairly apt, although the closest thing I have to a God is a convoluted metaphor involving children's non-toxic all-purpose glue. I have decided that I quite like the panache of the term occultist, however, and number among some of my dearest goals the hope that a fascination with symbology and demonology will someday turn into something lucrative. Probably fantasy novels, though I'm open to other opportunities.
Here is the breakdown of my answers by category. This will be important later:
* Fundamentalist Christian (You scored 0)
* Holy Roller (You scored 0)
* Average Christian (You scored 0)
* True Christian (You scored 0)
* Modern Satanist (You scored 2)
* Theistic/Traditional Satanist (You scored 0)
* Luciferian (You scored 0)
* Devil Worshipper (You scored 0)
* Atheist (You scored 2)
* Agnostic (You scored 0)
* New Aged/Wiccan (You scored 0)
* Pagan/Occultist (You scored 3)
* Discordian (You scored 0)
* Category Unknown (You scored 3)
I think my modern Satanist scores come from my willingness to examine Satan's role as an archetype. Also, possibly, the fact that I am writing a book about Satan and his sweet sweet love. With that in mind, I took the quiz for Beelzebub, just to see what happened. He came up as....
True Christian
You are humble, gracious, kind and extremely Christ-like. You believe in the bible as your law, but read it in its original language. Perhaps you're not a scholar, but you're not an amateur either. You normally don't feel church is acceptable for your form of worship, and if anyone believes different from you, you might try to learn something from them. [Edited once more for spelling by TM].
Now, I know Bill is very self-sacrificing, but this seems a bit improbable. Let us examine his breakdown of answers:
* Fundamentalist Christian (You scored 0)
* Holy Roller (You scored 0)
* Average Christian (You scored 0)
* True Christian (You scored 3)
* Modern Satanist (You scored 2)
* Theistic/Traditional Satanist (You scored 0)
* Luciferian (You scored 3)
* Devil Worshipper (You scored 1)
* Atheist (You scored 0)
* Agnostic (You scored 0)
* New Aged/Wiccan (You scored 0)
* Pagan/Occultist (You scored 0)
* Discordian (You scored 0)
* Category Unknown (You scored 1)
Now we see the faults inherent in the system! Bill loves the Prince of Darkness for his glory, his unswerving devotion to his principles, and his skill in the bedchamber, and is on a first-name basis with him. However, the Lord of Flies is also a little pissed that Luce got them all in this mess, and will be the first one to tell you that Satan is a force for evil and corruption, and as such, rather dangerous to be around.
Apparently unable to aggregate trends towards worship of the Arch-Enemy, the quiz has decided that Bill, due to his credulous and fairly canonical acceptance of the LORD and Jesus Christ as the Powers Most High, is a True Christian. Ah, if only faith were enough... unfortunately for Bill, believing that God will kick his ass if he sneezes wrong does not constitute being a devoted Christian.
This reminds me of an excerpt from my book, but I can't post it here because it's far too naughty. *tantalizes the audience*
Wednesday, November 10, 2004
Halfway
Yay! I reached the halfway point on my NaNovel! Um...more excerpts coming soon. Sosleepy. I think Purin's SAD might be contagious. I also went to check out a critique group tonight that seems pretty cool, so I might start bringing them some BotI in December. Also, I got bored at work and downloaded the Project Gutenberg etext of Paradise Lost, and have been memorizing it whenever I have nothing else to do. I didn't start from the beginning because I like the bits with Satan and Beelzebub best. This is what I have so far: (totally from memory omg!!!1)
There the companions of his Fall, o'erwhelm'd
With Floods and Whirlwinds of tempestuous fire
He soon discerns, and welt'ring by his side
One next himself in crime, and next in power
Long after known in Palestine, and nam'd
Beelzebub. To whom the Arch-Enemy,
And thence in Heav'n called Satan, with bold words
Breaking the horrid silence thus began:
"If thou beest he; but O! How Fall'n! How chang'd
From him who in the happy Realms of Light
Clothed in transcendent brightness didst outshine
Myriads though bright; If he whom mutual league
United thoughts and counsels, equal hope,
And hazard in the glorious enterprise
Joined with me once, now Misery hath join'd
In equal Ruin; into what Pit thou seest,
From what highth fall'n, so much the stronger proved
He with his Thunder; and till then who knew
The force of those dire arms? Yet not for those
Nor what the Potent Victor in his rage
Can else inflict, do I repent or change."
...For some reason I find the thought of Beelzebub "weltering" by Satan's side in a Lake of Fire to be incredibly, squooshily adorable. omg welt'ring chuuuu <3333
There the companions of his Fall, o'erwhelm'd
With Floods and Whirlwinds of tempestuous fire
He soon discerns, and welt'ring by his side
One next himself in crime, and next in power
Long after known in Palestine, and nam'd
Beelzebub. To whom the Arch-Enemy,
And thence in Heav'n called Satan, with bold words
Breaking the horrid silence thus began:
"If thou beest he; but O! How Fall'n! How chang'd
From him who in the happy Realms of Light
Clothed in transcendent brightness didst outshine
Myriads though bright; If he whom mutual league
United thoughts and counsels, equal hope,
And hazard in the glorious enterprise
Joined with me once, now Misery hath join'd
In equal Ruin; into what Pit thou seest,
From what highth fall'n, so much the stronger proved
He with his Thunder; and till then who knew
The force of those dire arms? Yet not for those
Nor what the Potent Victor in his rage
Can else inflict, do I repent or change."
...For some reason I find the thought of Beelzebub "weltering" by Satan's side in a Lake of Fire to be incredibly, squooshily adorable. omg welt'ring chuuuu <3333
Monday, November 08, 2004
Insert Maniacal Laughter Here
I came home from my job today to discover that there was a message on my answering machine from a place I'd applied to in early August, asking me if I was still interested in a job with them. This from the people who told me I didn't have enough office experience to be their proofreader. Bwaha. Still, this just goes to show once more that you should be nice to people even when they reject you. In employment, at least. All bets are off in personal relationships. I'll have to call them up tomorrow and explain that I am already employed (no thanks to them)! In a nice way, though.
More Lord of the House coming soon. . .although I have finally settled on a title that I like better. The new title is *drumroll*.....Counterpoise! It's a Middle Englishy word for a counterbalance on those old fashioned scale type thingies. The Balance is going to be pretty important, plus, the word is so lovely. Say it with me: counterpoise! Counterpoise! Ooo!
...I'm going to go write 2000 words now....
More Lord of the House coming soon. . .although I have finally settled on a title that I like better. The new title is *drumroll*.....Counterpoise! It's a Middle Englishy word for a counterbalance on those old fashioned scale type thingies. The Balance is going to be pretty important, plus, the word is so lovely. Say it with me: counterpoise! Counterpoise! Ooo!
...I'm going to go write 2000 words now....
Saturday, November 06, 2004
Lord of the House update
Here are some more snippets from Lord of the House.
Snippet #1: BEELZEBUB, masquerading in mortal form as William "Bill" Mouche, muses on Satan.
--------------------------
Maybe I was biased, but I'd kept the angel and the Enemy separate in my head and in my heart for this long, and even if Luce could be an absolute bastard sometimes, he wasn't any more innately evil than anyone else. Satan is just a role, and even the Accuser has to come home after putting in long hours, take off his soul-crushing boots of torment and destruction, and ask his lover how the management of Hell and the war against Good had gone that day.
--------------------------
Snippet #2: Bill meets Dee, a silly neo-Pagan, who offers to let him sublease a house with her and two others. He undergoes an unusual, consensus style debate over whether to allow him in the house. Deciding unanimously on yay, the housemates welcome him with a ceremony of cake and wine.
--------------------------
"Wine and cake!" Dee announced delightedly, clapping her hands. She kissed me squarely on the forehead and marshaled her housemates to open a bottle of wine, lay out plates, and slice pieces off a half-eaten Funfetti layer cake.
I was about to dig in when Dee slapped my hand down. "Not yet! We need a blessing. Why don't you do it, Bill?"
Prose and Henry seemed familiar with this routine, as they hadn't touched their cake at all. Everyone stared expectantly at me.
I could feel myself sweating. "I'm not really comfortable with blessings," I admitted shakily. Business agreements with the LORD were one thing. Actually calling down his favor on my head for the first time in thousands of years. . .well, I couldn't put it off forever if I was serious about redemption, but a house full of mortals that I didn't want incinerated didn't seem like the best venue to test it out. It's like they say about guns: always assume God is loaded.
"It's ok, Bill, I'll do it."
I tried my damnedest (and I know a thing or two about damnation) not to give Peter a pathetically grateful look.
Holding his hands over the wine and cake, Peter closed his eyes. "Thank you, O Lord--"
"Goddess," Dee opined.
"Self determination," Prose countered.
"Jesus Christ," Henry added, in a way that was not a blessing. "Can we get on with it?"
"Thank you, O greater powers, for giving us Bill. He seems like a cool guy, and he knows karate and has money in his bank account, and makes a good omelette. So in his honor, I bless this bread and wine."
"Cake, you silly Catholic," Dee prompted fondly.
"Right, cake," Peter corrected, embarrassed.
"So mote it be!" Dee added with a flourish, and everyone dug in.
I eyed my cake nervously and forced myself to bring a morsel to my mouth.
Sometimes, when ITHAM gets bored, he plants a tree in Hell. It is the greenest tree you have ever seen, and it bears the reddest fruit. We, the Fallen Ones, are drawn to it every time; we cannot turn away. Our bodies become serpentine and limbless when we reach for the fruit, but our desire for it is so great that we strive upwards and taste it with our fangs. For a brief instant its flesh is yielding and poisoned with ecstatic sweetness, but then it turns to choking ash. The Tree of Heaven erupts in cinders and singes us as we writhe in suffocated agony.
That was a little like what I was expecting the cake to do. To my surprise I found that it was a little dry, but not that bad.
--------------------------
ITHAM is how Bill thinks of the LORD GOD, by the way. I'm really liking all the characters so far, although Peter is turning out more adorable, and Dee even more of a spaz, than I originally thought. Prose is deliciously postmodern; later we will find out that her name is actually Proserpina.
Snippet #1: BEELZEBUB, masquerading in mortal form as William "Bill" Mouche, muses on Satan.
--------------------------
Maybe I was biased, but I'd kept the angel and the Enemy separate in my head and in my heart for this long, and even if Luce could be an absolute bastard sometimes, he wasn't any more innately evil than anyone else. Satan is just a role, and even the Accuser has to come home after putting in long hours, take off his soul-crushing boots of torment and destruction, and ask his lover how the management of Hell and the war against Good had gone that day.
--------------------------
Snippet #2: Bill meets Dee, a silly neo-Pagan, who offers to let him sublease a house with her and two others. He undergoes an unusual, consensus style debate over whether to allow him in the house. Deciding unanimously on yay, the housemates welcome him with a ceremony of cake and wine.
--------------------------
"Wine and cake!" Dee announced delightedly, clapping her hands. She kissed me squarely on the forehead and marshaled her housemates to open a bottle of wine, lay out plates, and slice pieces off a half-eaten Funfetti layer cake.
I was about to dig in when Dee slapped my hand down. "Not yet! We need a blessing. Why don't you do it, Bill?"
Prose and Henry seemed familiar with this routine, as they hadn't touched their cake at all. Everyone stared expectantly at me.
I could feel myself sweating. "I'm not really comfortable with blessings," I admitted shakily. Business agreements with the LORD were one thing. Actually calling down his favor on my head for the first time in thousands of years. . .well, I couldn't put it off forever if I was serious about redemption, but a house full of mortals that I didn't want incinerated didn't seem like the best venue to test it out. It's like they say about guns: always assume God is loaded.
"It's ok, Bill, I'll do it."
I tried my damnedest (and I know a thing or two about damnation) not to give Peter a pathetically grateful look.
Holding his hands over the wine and cake, Peter closed his eyes. "Thank you, O Lord--"
"Goddess," Dee opined.
"Self determination," Prose countered.
"Jesus Christ," Henry added, in a way that was not a blessing. "Can we get on with it?"
"Thank you, O greater powers, for giving us Bill. He seems like a cool guy, and he knows karate and has money in his bank account, and makes a good omelette. So in his honor, I bless this bread and wine."
"Cake, you silly Catholic," Dee prompted fondly.
"Right, cake," Peter corrected, embarrassed.
"So mote it be!" Dee added with a flourish, and everyone dug in.
I eyed my cake nervously and forced myself to bring a morsel to my mouth.
Sometimes, when ITHAM gets bored, he plants a tree in Hell. It is the greenest tree you have ever seen, and it bears the reddest fruit. We, the Fallen Ones, are drawn to it every time; we cannot turn away. Our bodies become serpentine and limbless when we reach for the fruit, but our desire for it is so great that we strive upwards and taste it with our fangs. For a brief instant its flesh is yielding and poisoned with ecstatic sweetness, but then it turns to choking ash. The Tree of Heaven erupts in cinders and singes us as we writhe in suffocated agony.
That was a little like what I was expecting the cake to do. To my surprise I found that it was a little dry, but not that bad.
--------------------------
ITHAM is how Bill thinks of the LORD GOD, by the way. I'm really liking all the characters so far, although Peter is turning out more adorable, and Dee even more of a spaz, than I originally thought. Prose is deliciously postmodern; later we will find out that her name is actually Proserpina.
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
The sign of the beast (plus an order of magnitude)
6666= best and most appropriate NaNo word count ever.
Also note that 6666 is 13% of 50,000. Ominous indeed.
The end times are nigh! Bring on the Bowl of Wrath!
Also note that 6666 is 13% of 50,000. Ominous indeed.
The end times are nigh! Bring on the Bowl of Wrath!
Monday, November 01, 2004
The madness begins!
My NaNovel got off to a rousing 2,282 word start last night--and that was just in an hour and a half. I can only hope the rest of it goes so well. And that I don't fall asleep during my first full day of work today. @_* Yay, I can update my NaNometer!
Here's an excerpt from Lord of the House:
---------------------------------------------------
Some might think it common courtesy to leave a note, or some sort of explanation, when abandoning their best friend of several millennia. They are not the companions of Satan. Besides, if I'd left him a Dear John note, it would have gone something like:
You evil, narcissistic, cheating, lying, self-absorbed, paranoid asshole--
I love you but I'm not going to take your shit anymore.
Yours, Beelzebub.
So maybe it's better that I just left.
-----------------------------------------------------
Stay tuned for more!
Here's an excerpt from Lord of the House:
---------------------------------------------------
Some might think it common courtesy to leave a note, or some sort of explanation, when abandoning their best friend of several millennia. They are not the companions of Satan. Besides, if I'd left him a Dear John note, it would have gone something like:
You evil, narcissistic, cheating, lying, self-absorbed, paranoid asshole--
I love you but I'm not going to take your shit anymore.
Yours, Beelzebub.
So maybe it's better that I just left.
-----------------------------------------------------
Stay tuned for more!
