Thothmuffin
Don't get any crumbs on the scale of judgement.
Friday, June 17, 2005
Jargon Zen
A scene, not true so much as it is fictionalized, but not so false as to be untrue.
SALESGUY is eating out at the finest of fast food restaurants with NORMALGIRL, an old acquaintance who he is attempting to impress by explaining the sorts of things one does in a sales position for something no doubt odious. TM, sitting one table over, observes the carnage.
NG: So, then what do you do?
SALES: Well, then we just send them the boilerplate.
NG: What's a boilerplate?
SALES: *absolutely floored at having to explain it* Well, it's just a...it's like a thing, you send...uh, it's like, when you have it, you send it to people, and it's already...it's like... (Arches backward in frustration, pressing the palm of his hand to his forehead. It is a classic brainfreeze posture; I couldn't have made this up if I tried.) Ah, God, I know what it is, it's just. . .
TM: *sotto voce* It's like obscenity. I know it when I see it.
NG: *sipping drink, schadenfreude* So it's like a form they fill out?
SALES: *starting to panic* No, no, it's...ok, see, you have this piece, there's already something there...*violent hand gestures do not avail him*
TM: *aside* A boilerplate is a generic piece of text that can be copied, pasted, and used again and again in many different documents. Think EULAs, legal documents, and company "About Us" blurbs.
NG: *delves into fries as SALES continues to struggle. She knows this is no longer about impressing her; this is Man vs. Jargon*
TM: *to self* Ooh, you've lost her.
SALES: *knows it, just as he knows Jargon has won this round* Anyway, it's just sort of an insurance thing that we send to people. It's not important.
TM: *silently* Well, my work here is done.
--
[scene continues, but is truncated due to the graphic nature of its awkwardness]
SALESGUY is eating out at the finest of fast food restaurants with NORMALGIRL, an old acquaintance who he is attempting to impress by explaining the sorts of things one does in a sales position for something no doubt odious. TM, sitting one table over, observes the carnage.
NG: So, then what do you do?
SALES: Well, then we just send them the boilerplate.
NG: What's a boilerplate?
SALES: *absolutely floored at having to explain it* Well, it's just a...it's like a thing, you send...uh, it's like, when you have it, you send it to people, and it's already...it's like... (Arches backward in frustration, pressing the palm of his hand to his forehead. It is a classic brainfreeze posture; I couldn't have made this up if I tried.) Ah, God, I know what it is, it's just. . .
TM: *sotto voce* It's like obscenity. I know it when I see it.
NG: *sipping drink, schadenfreude* So it's like a form they fill out?
SALES: *starting to panic* No, no, it's...ok, see, you have this piece, there's already something there...*violent hand gestures do not avail him*
TM: *aside* A boilerplate is a generic piece of text that can be copied, pasted, and used again and again in many different documents. Think EULAs, legal documents, and company "About Us" blurbs.
NG: *delves into fries as SALES continues to struggle. She knows this is no longer about impressing her; this is Man vs. Jargon*
TM: *to self* Ooh, you've lost her.
SALES: *knows it, just as he knows Jargon has won this round* Anyway, it's just sort of an insurance thing that we send to people. It's not important.
TM: *silently* Well, my work here is done.
--
[scene continues, but is truncated due to the graphic nature of its awkwardness]
A question
I just watched Vanity Fair. Why do people like Becky Sharp?
Probably the same reason they like Scarlett O'Hara.
Gah.
Also, I want Jonathan Rhys Meyers' hair.
Haha oh, wait, is this a blog? Do I post on it? Sorry. ^_^;;
EDIT: With the magic of hair glue, JRM's hair is MINE!!!
Oh, Friday night at home <3.
Probably the same reason they like Scarlett O'Hara.
Gah.
Also, I want Jonathan Rhys Meyers' hair.
Haha oh, wait, is this a blog? Do I post on it? Sorry. ^_^;;
EDIT: With the magic of hair glue, JRM's hair is MINE!!!
Oh, Friday night at home <3.
